Excerpt from my writing in the Words Matter, NCC Women's Ministry Advent Devotional
December 16, 2011
When I was gestating in my mother’s womb, the doctors determined my sex by listening to my heartbeat. Through gender assumptions about athleticism and speed of my heart rate, it was determined that I was a boy. When I was born, the very first words spoken when the doctor looked at my vagina were: “Oops, it’s a girl.”
This story of my birth delights me today as a butch transgender bodied person, because it names the way I’ve felt like a boy in my heart but have the body of a woman. Believing all the after school specials and talks about puberty, I thought everyone grew up with the same discomfort in their body, so I dedicated my teenage years to loving my body when what I saw in the mirror didn’t match the desires of my heart.
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